Posts Tagged: weck's wiki


"[Jonathan tries to keep talking with three cigarettes in his mouth.]
Seth: That’s awesome information, probably impossible for our listeners to hear, because you’re chewing tobacco on the right side of your mouth and you have a cigarette on the left.
Jah: Every time I say Johnny Cash I want to smoke, I don’t know why."

- Episode 60
Episode 89 (2007), 0:57: Seth was standing on a sidewalk during the Halloween celebration in West Hollywood and saw a man dressed up as Mystery from The Pickup Artist. Oh wait, it was Mystery – and Seth shook his and Matador’s hands, then walked down the Boulevard with Mystery as his wingman.

Weck’s Wiki


Babytini’s for everyone!

“That baby has been up in his mom’s vag for the last nine months… he needs a babytini to relax.”


Babytini’s for everyone!

“That baby has been up in his mom’s vag for the last nine months… he needs a babytini to relax.”

Source: thedailywhat

Seth wants J-dawg to make one limited edition run of 1980s-style UYD half-shirts. Seth remembers wearing a half-shirt for a whole summer when he was about 11 years old. He wore it to church and didn’t give a shit. He had a taut, tan body that he calls, “A NAMBLA dream.”


"UYD: For the Aliens to Find Out"


WATCH THIS SHOW. It is so fucking cray. You will never think about the Dew the same way. I was all over it back in ‘09, having a particular affection for the Appalachian breed of herda hadda. It does not disappoint in the stereotype-fulfillment arena. See below:

154: Seth teases Friday’s 20/20 episode where Diane Sawyer is doing an investigative report on the poverty in Appalachia. They did a teaser on Good Morning America that showed that the toothlessness rate is so high because everyone there is addicted to Mountain Dew

155: Seth re-references the 20/20 episode about the Mountain Dew mouth where they pull up to a group of people trying to get rubber off tires and making black smoke. People there go into a convenience store and buy 2 Milky Ways, a Snickers, 4 bags of chips and a 40-ounce Mountain Dew. A baby is walking around in a dirty diaper in the house where they don’t have any formula, so the dad give the baby some Pepsi. They show a kid who’s a good football player and they want him to get out but he can’t. His stepbrother has a 17-year-old girlfriend with 2 kids, smoking and she found him fucking his 15-year-old stepsister in an outhouse. They have to take the 15-year-old girl to a Social Services place so she can deal with that. They’re driving down the hill to go into town, and the father is getting angry about the stereotypes of incest and saying it happens everywhere: “You know the saying – the closer the kin, the deeper in.”


A) Woman angry at her boyfriend, gives him some drinks, then lights his balls on fire:

Berlinda Dixon-Newbold is charged with aggravated assault for lighting the crotch of her boyfriend’s pants on fire while he slept. She did it because she wanted more attention. His balls survived. Hey bitch, did you try waking him up first?

B) Man shoots girlfriend in rectum:

Prosecutor Chris Poole had asked he get the maximum 10 years, saying the case is “as bad as it gets.”

Judge Sandy Mattice said he did not find premeditation so the sentence was based on attempted second-degree murder.

Garner, when it was his turn to speak, turned and addressed the family of victim Roxanne Arrowsmith. He said, “Tell her I didn’t mean for this to happen. I’m really sorry.”

Ms. Arrowsmith survived the Oct. 26, 2003, shooting, but she had multiple organs damaged and has undergone numerous surgeries.

An appeals court threw out the case on a technicality. Garner had one night of freedom before he was picked up on a charge relating to the use of the weapon.

It was testified earlier that Garner and the girlfriend first said the shooting was accidental.

A witness said Ms. Arrowsmith later said Garner was upset and he grabbed her by the legs, pulled them apart, put the gun’s barrel in her rectum and pulled the trigger.

Garner later said he crawled in bed with Ms. Arrowsmith, cuddled up to her and the gun went off in her rectum.

(Sounds legit to me.)

So, lifers, tell me true:

Who’s makin’ it work? Ms. Pants on Fire or Mr. Cuddle Monster?


TCAP_RECAP: “Scenic” New Jersey

I know. I’m so edgy for shitting on New Jersey. No one’s ever done that before. But that’s Dr. Hansen’s opener when dipping us back in to another gripping episode of TCAP, this time taking place in Ocean County, NJ. 

I have to say…Mock Turtleneck’s fist bump is like, the bossest thing that’s ever happened on TCAP ever. So fucking fresh. 

Check out Weed Man and Kevin Dude below:

Episode 74, 4:13


[I’d like to let y’all know that I just made a huge adjustment from working a job where I had two hours of down time every day while the baby I watched took a nap (plus Thursdays off) to attending a full time (and surprisingly hardcore) cosmetology school, so I’ve been sort of ghost riding this whip of a blog lately. If I had my way, I’d be all up in this blog’s gullyworks 24/7/365 to bring you the freshest UYD bidness. Alas, if only I could juggle life as gracefully as Sethro. I’ll get there. -Caitlin]

C-train, you are grace in a giggle suit; any amount of you is a treat, like chocolate. (Y’all know how to make chocolate don’t you? First you take chocolate…) -S. 

Source: SoundCloud / caitlinUYD4L


The wind

Once again, little-butt contributes gold to UYD Nation. You go girl! You’ve come a long way, baby!*

This is a pretty spot on imagining of Jah’s heroine from the free-form poem “Hunting and Tracking" in my humble opinion. 


*I don’t mean this personally, little-butt…it’s just that every time I say, “You go girl!” I immediately think of Virginia Slims for some reason. 

Source: little-butt

"I TiVo, like, a lot of shows on MTV, like My Super Sweet 16, and I’ll watch them on the weekend. Now I like Tiara Girls. It’s like, ‘Oh my God.’ On the second season of My Super Sweet 16, it was crazy because they had all seen the first season, so they were trying to top what the girls did in the first season."


Anderson Cooper, Quote of the Week: Episode 16


[Coop - I love you to pieces, I really do. That giggle fit you had? Priceless. So, uhhh, when you gonna step outta that closet dog? The Pride Parade would be soooo wicked stoked to have you! You’re fabulous! In the words of RuPaul: “If you can’t love yourself, how the hell are you gonna love somebody else? Can I get an amen!” -Love, Caitlin]

AMEN!!! -SethRu


Rumor: Seth was at Pavilions one time around midnight and he saw a couple of gentleman laughing, slapping each other, and staring deep into each other’s eyes. It was Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Justin Long. Justin Long kind of gets around doesn’t he? He does a lot  slapping I reckon. And that Joseph Gordon-Levitt? Based on some of the indie-flick roles he’s taken in the past, I’m not surprised that walks on the wild side from time to time. 

Episode 266


{Look, I usually toe the UYD party line, but let’s face it: my boo Joey G-Lev is way out of ole LongDawg’s league. I mean, sometimes a girl’s gotta speak truth to power. -Sethro P. Newton} 

[Doi, that’s the truest. Justin Long is the poor man’s Joseph Gordon-Levitt. -Caitlin]

[Did I just forget how to read or did two lovely ladies just say they are down with JGL? Where the fuck am I? -aighead]

2012 for life



"I don’t want an estra shot of expresso; I would like an extra shot of espresso."



12- 23:17 


Goooooo: An high-pitched exclamation uttered by Seth while impersonating people he doesn’t like (pronounced gew).

Used in a sentence: “‘Goooooo I’m swimming!’ No you’re not; you’re in a bathtub, Seth, playing Michael Phelps’ fake non-existent game. Goooooo!!!!!” (Episode 146, 46:22)


"You can’t drink lasagna—CAUSE IT DOESN’T HAVE DRINKABILITY!!"

-Seth Romatelli

Seth would’ve been even more pissed about the Bud Light “drinkability” campaign if he’d known it wasn’t even an original approach. Look at this Crisco ad, it’s even wacker!

Good Housekeeping, December 1943:

“…see how Crisco-frying makes those Franks in Blankets brown and crisp. And they’re so digestible even children may eat ‘em!”

"Ugh, mom, these wood chips you fed me aren’t digestible!" 

(See how it says “point-thrifty frankfurters?” That was because this was from 1943, during WWII, so there was food rationing on a point system. The government controlled how the food that was leftover after the soldiers were fed was divided up, trying to make it fair so that it didn’t become so that only the rich could afford decent food. Since hot dogs are made with pork squeezin’s or something, you could get lots of them with your monthly allotment of meat. Something like steak, though, you’d have to save up your stamps for. -Sethro)

(via grooveland)

Source: questionableadvice

No one ever gets fired anymore.

Uh, hey Roondog? I know you’re dead right now or whatever, but I just wanted to let you know that my best friend’s dad got fired like 3 weeks ago. And when I was in sales back in ‘09, the guy next to me got fired because he wasn’t good at his job. Everyone is getting fired.  

I mean, Rooney’s dead now, but he was alive when George W. Dumbass kinda fucked our economy over and we as a nation were losing like, a grip of jobs, so…whatchyu talkin ‘bout Rooney? 

-Episode 291