Posts Tagged: new orleans

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"New Orleans is the Robin Williams of cities."

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Seth, UYD (via johnwilkestooth)

loooollllllll, he fuckin’ wishes

  

(via johnwilkestooth-deactivated2013)

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  • What famous New Orleans chef served Jah the best meal of his life?

Répondez , S.V.P. We’re at: twitter—@uyd4life, email—uyd4life@gmail.com, or here at uyd4life.tumblr.com. Entrants will be put in a pool to win a dope UYD card. 

I’m still missing an address I lost from one of you who won a contest months ago… Maybe you are cloaking because you saw that I glittered the shit out of it? You can’t piss on sparkletality, I won’t allow it.

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(the) MARDI GRAS IS EVERYTHING

a short essay by Sethro Matelli

It’s really nice for Jah that his grandma sent him and his fam a box of beads for Mardi Gras and gave them the parade experience. It’s like Marcia sending Seth the Autumn leaf. I loved beads when I was a kid, too. I’d play with them, wear them, I… I  probably used to put those shits in my mouth all the time. Kids are stupid. I was a kid. Holy shit, I’m dying of lead. I’m dying, I’m dying, I’m dying…Shitty Chinese shit. AHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Mardi Gras ain’t about beads, though, or parades once you’re an adult. It ain’t about anything except partying. You even get out of school for it. And it’s like sanctioned by God. Like, you’re supposed to get wasted, religiously. (I think, right?) FO’ REAL. It takes a serious, committed, and focused mind—and a drunk one. “Mardi Gras day 2,” wrote one friend, “also a success, but a more painful one. Now if I could just keep down this pedialyte…” It’s the best time ever.

Big Al Carson - Take Your Drunken Ass Home (2002)

As an aficionado of carnival (yes), I was wary while listening to UYD’s coverage of my beloved holiday in episode 311. I was left unsure about two things. First, I thought they might still throw Zulu coconuts (no one can ever wake up early enough for that parade even though it’s supposed to be really cool and I don’t think it starts until around 4:00). Second, I was going to talk about them saying “the Mardi Gras,” like, who says that? So, I went to verify my facts on the facebook:

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Yeah you right. I concede to Jah’s representative, Professor Longhair. (Dude, he’s a Professor! He has tenure!) Furthermore, although the Zulu suit was tossed, I think they usually hand out the coconuts now to avoid the issue. So, the boys are on point, as uszh. 

In conclusion, despite Dr. John’s general all-timeness, dopeness, and irreproachability, I like ths version of the Mardi Gras anthem Iko Iko by the Dixie Cups best. 

 

Another version, part of which was Jah’s ringtone—Dr. John’s Gumbo recording—is superb and does make a superior ringtone, which is why I’ve made it available for you to download on Soundcloud. I’m sure Jah’s like, “Awesome, I hoped everyone else would have my fresh new ringtone.”

Source: nola.com / uyd4life
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How do you make chocolate?

Yeah, he made some mistakes. But in our defense, before Katrina, we thought he was going to be really, really not-as-bad as the other politicians/criminals. And to be fair, I don’t think he’s actually in jail at the moment. [Looks around for confirmation; No? Ok!] All right, YAY!, so that, plus his AMAZING SKILLS as a chocolatier, means he is probably one of Louisiana’s Top Ten Politicians of All Time!! Great work, Mayor Nagin! 

 

See: Bag of money in freezer during Katrina guy, David DuKKKe, felonious governor, and my town’s congressman who thought an Onion article was real. 

Source: SoundCloud / uyd4life
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"I don’t like it when people say stuff like that is controversial instead of plain old stupid. Talking like an asshole isn’t controversial. It’s fucking stupid and you should shut the fuck up."

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-Jonathan on the Chocolate City

Episode 158, 25:30

Hey, did anyone happen to keep that recipe? You know, the one for that delicious chocolate drink?

Source: uhhyeahdude.com
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Nicolas Cage reveals animal sex factor in diet

"The Sun reports that the Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call – New Orleans actor only eats meat from animals that mate in a ‘dignified’ way."

Look guys, there are a lot of panny-inducing things going on here, not least of which is this picture, which I guess is his mature, middle-aged, John Tesh-y look?

But I really need my brains for the rest of the day, so I cannot possibly think too much about his kabillions of dollars worth of property holdings (Eppy 165, 35:33), his bidding wars over dinosaur bones, whether—as one Parade Magazine letter writer once asked—he and Richard Gere are brothers (yes), and—as Seth once wondered—who would win in a fight between him and Jim Carrey (him), much less how he likes his food to fuck. Jaysus. 

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When I moved up to Rochester from Louisiana, I went into food-culture shock. An example of the lackluster local fare in this cold Northern hell is the beef on weck sandwich, which tries to make up for the bland flesh it contain’s unbeefy flavor with a thick coating of chunky salt covering the bread.

Beef on Weck 

That’s no joke. This is the wicked fucking worst excuse for a sandwich I’ve ever had. A po’ boy actually called me on a pay phone to threaten to fight it from New Orleans, that’s how undelicious it was. Seth’s fluffernutter actually drove down from Boston to slap me in the mouth for eating it.

On the other hand, there’s this guy who is also called Weck, but he is the super best. Weck (well, he has a real name, but that’s his jizz biz, dude) is the superbrain behind UYD nation’s knowledge base, and he is clearly a very dedicated genius. Judging from the time-suck this website has been for just the weeks it’s been up, Weck is either incredibly quick or he devotes an amazing amount of time to the show—probably both. He’s the one who writes up all the summaries of the shows, offers us answers to our most difficult questions, backs up the wiki (he fucking wrote the wiki for that matter), and from whom I sometimes adapt or even outright steal already transcribed quotes and get references for stories I recap. 

Ladies and gentlemen, that makes him a hero for this girl. Thanks, Weckersley. You are an internet angel. (<—An image search which, oddly, returns no funny hits. What a strange, sad day. “Fluffernutter driving a car” didn’t do much better, but that’s to be expected. There has to be something to look forward to in the future.)

Source: uhhyeahdude.com
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Episode Two:

"Nobody knows whether God called for the hurricane." 

-New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin

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"Can anybody find that out?"

-Audio Blogger Seth Romatelli

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Ray Nagin Mardi Gras

Source: uhhyeahdude.com