Posts Tagged: Narcs

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my name is Jonathan and this is Seth

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I hear the atmo in there is just thick with high-T and respect for the UYLadies. 

Informant Kat confirms the overall swooniness of the nation. Extremely pretty, wearing a rainbow of Axe body sprays, and, she assures me, regularly exchanging the UYD secret handshake. (Showing twins.)  

[images via Twitterers Dave Enstad, Dave Moore, sicklemen romance, Jordan Gilbert and Ronald Cox, Informant Kat and forum member Mat.]

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BREAKING: Jonathan’s beard is being waxed by old-world professionals boated in from across the Puget Sound, where Jonathan knew a girl once. This is what the challenge coin money was earmarked for, apparently.

Informant Kat says it’s pretty awesome in there.

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BREAKING: We have gotten our first report. Apparently, Seth is dressed only in a red union suit, is desperately grasping an open umbrella, and is forcing all the kids to take milly while looking at penis shots. Everyone is LOVING IT!!! 

BREAKING: We have gotten our first report. Apparently, Seth is dressed only in a red union suit, is desperately grasping an open umbrella, and is forcing all the kids to take milly while looking at penis shots. Everyone is LOVING IT!!! 

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If anyone going to the show wants to message me updates, I’ll post them up here as we go. There’s gotta be a word for it. Present logging? No… Streaming blogging? Nope. Live writing? Hmmm… Get at me. Here or at uyd4life@gmail.com.

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Seattle Live Show: Saving Seth 20 Minutes

STG Presents:
Uhh Yeah Dude
Friday, January 13, 2012
Doors at 7:00pm
Show at 8:00pm

You better fucking go to this show if you’re on the west coast. I ain’t fucking around. It had better be sold out and soon. Come on, UYD Nation, show the boys how much and how fast we can love them. I want them to come east so badly and they aren’t going to if y’all don’t do your job and appreciate them properly. That’s right, I’m calling you out, left coast!
For those of you with tickets: Seth will be the one holding the umbrella. Please do not assault him. He would like everyone to know that he is not a narc. He might try to show you some porn, but just because he thinks that’s how to connect with today’s youth. [Please do not react by throwing scalding hot beverages on him; he will not respond by saying “Oh, Yeah” and driving away in his ladies’ underwear, despite that being customary in Washington state.] Just be gentle with him. He’s very tender and we’d like to keep him that way.

Jah will be the one macking on the undergrads. He might be trying to get some nipple play [that is his game] or he might just want to go home with you so he can talk on your headset while you play Halo [Naptime, Jew!]. Either way, you’ll probably end up doing whatever he wants, especially if he hits you with those baby blues or looses those sexy dreads. Also, I heard he’s been tanning his ass off. Hey, he didn’t ask for his uncontrollable animal magnetism. (Jah needs his prophets to be appealing, you know, for practical reasons of demagoguery and so on.) Only one person has ever been known to be immune to his wiles, Gertude Baines. However, you can’t ask for her opinion because she is no longer with us. Coincidence? Actually, probably so. She was wicked, wicked old. She was so old she died. (But, she lived a good life, died of natural causes, and got to meet Seth and Jah. I’m kinda totally jelly.) 

Experience the magic of the greatest ever anything, Uhh Yeah Dude, for yourself in person. Buy your tickets for the live show now!!! And why not think about bringing the boys some presents while you’re at it? I know I would. A craft, a funny or cute decorative item, or a Starbucks or Whole Foods gift card, maybe. Show Seth and Jonathan how much we appreciate all 301 episodes!

Seth's Seattle Recon Trip- Kurt's Park
Gertrude Baines

Source: uhhyeahdude.com